Florida State Wins The National Championship or, The BCS is Dead and Buried

By Justin Cates

The final five BCS football games were all wonderful.

This season's games were exciting, evenly matched and generally without controversy. The national championship game between Florida State and Auburn was for my money the best championship of the entire BCS system—save for the first three quarters of the title game in 2000.

For the most part, the results of the BCS actually turned out to be the "right" ones pretty much every time. There was some healthy debate regarding the participants on occasion, but almost every national champion crowned under the system was considered the best team in college football.

But that's all no more.

Now we can all look forward to a future where we sit in our post-apocalyptic bunkers regaling the youth with tales of this antiquated system.

"When I was growing up computers decided the national champion in football."

"You mean like Skynet?"

"No, no. This was back before the machines became self-aware. Humans fed a bunch of data into a formula we created and the machines spat out the two teams allowed to play for the championship."

"So the computers didn't even design the formula?"

"Nah. Actually, most of the data we used was based on subjective human observations too. It was really one of the last times we controlled the machines..."

"This is a bad story Grandpa. Tell us again about telephones that plugged into the wall!"

Pictured: A visual approximation of the BCS computers.

Right. Where were we? Ah yes, FOOTBALL! 'MURICA! CHAMPIONS!

Some general thoughts about game:

Florida State is here to stay. I knew he could recruit, but now we know Jimbo Fisher is a full-on football coach which is scary. He also seems pretty classy and humble.

Even seeing him cowed by old age, I still had an uncontrollable desire to punch Bobby Bowden in the neck. I hope he spends his days sitting on a fishing boat staring wistfully into the distance muttering "dadgummit" under his breath.

Brent Musberger gets worse with each passing moment.

I'm sure there was a time before I was born when Musberger was cogent and delivered crisp calls without fawning over hot coeds in the stands or accidentally announcing himself as Kirk Herbstreit.

That being said, I want him gone before he does to Kirk what Tim McCarver did to Joe Buck. This can't end well.

ESPN kept billing their "mega-cast" as some revolution in broadcasting. I found it annoying as it really just amounted to dozens of their analysts—some of whom have no particular football expertise—clogging their various platforms with half-cocked observations and hooting and hollering. I did all that on my own thank you kindly.

On the bright side for ESPN, Nick Saban was terrific and Tim Tebow was actually pretty tolerable.

Both were impressive in their game predictions with Tebow calling for a 35-31 FSU win and Saban saying Auburn would need to score 35 points to win. Bravo gents.

Florida State's win ties a nice bow on this college football season and now we can all look forward to the new college football playoff.

Anticipation is one thing but please, pace yourselves friends! There's still 233 days until the opening game between Ole Miss and Boise State.

How ESPN Killed Tim Tebow's Career

By W.T. Salisbury M.D.

Heisman Trophy winner Tim Tebow is currently in the process of washing out of the NFL, and if you're one of those people who can't stand him, you have ESPN to thank.

The mothership went out of it's way to push the "Tebow angle" because they thrive on beating a dead horse, reviving it, and beating it again.

It's no secret that personalities were instructed to mention Tebow as often as possible. Former ESPN college basketball analyst and current CBS punching bag Doug Gottlieb mentioned this fact a while back on The Dan Patrick Show.

I was told specifically, 'You can't talk enough Tebow.' I would jokingly throw it into a segment. 'I gotta find 15 seconds here to talk about Tebow, all right let's move on and talk about Major League Baseball.'

And this is what ESPN does now. Rather than report the news they attempt to create it in the most haphazard of manners.

What the actual story consists of is inconsequential. Whether it's Brett Favre coming out of retirement, anything someone like Tebow or LeBron James says, or a big upcoming event they're broadcasting, ESPN loves to jam it down our throats until we finally say, "Man, this must be a big deal".

Tebow in particular has been the goose that lays the golden egg. The trouble is, rather than let the eggs come when they're ready ESPN decided to scream in the goose's ear to goad it along.

"I want to control the news cycle NOW!"

Eventually, the poor beast became so stressed out by these fools that it couldn't lay any eggs at all.

Having no alternatives, they killed, cooked and carved the bird devouring it whole only to move on to the next unlucky fowl.

If it wasn't clear, Tim Tebow is the goose in this scenario.

Certainly, the fact that Tim Tebow isn't a very good quarterback is also a factor in his being blackballed. But he's at least as capable as a host of second and third string backups throughout the NFL.

Most young guys with raw talent and a flawed throwing motion would get a chance to naturally develop behind a more polished veteran. For example, Philip Rivers throws a football like I discard an empty beer can but he's now a veteran Pro Bowler.

Sometimes patience pays off, sometimes it doesn't. Backups wash out all the time—even former first round draft picks—but rarely do they receive attention like this.

ESPN went out of their way to constantly bombard us with Tebow coverage, even injecting him into unrelated stories. They oversaturated the market with Tebow nonsense to such an extent that he became a "circus" and too big of a "risk" for teams to consider bringing him on board.

Now, ESPN has the gall to report on how he can't find a job as a free agent because of this "circus" that their very network had a significant role in creating.

Tim Tebow minding his own business. HOW DARE HE?!

It's the worst kind of non-journalism. ESPN doesn't report the news, they make it. It's manufactured in a gleaming, high-definition studio trimmed with neon backlights and greed all quaintly nestled in rural Connecticut.  

Nothing Tebow does on his own really stirs up controversy that isn't created by the media.

Does he talk about his religion? Yeah, but only when he's asked about it. He doesn't go out of his way to mention it when being asked football questions.

Even if he does bring it up, it's to thank his Lord and savior for his blessings which seemingly every marginal athlete does when interviewed postgame.

Again, he is flawed as a player even though he has the intangibles of "heart"and "toughness" which every hack of a general manager and hard-nosed coach claims to want in a player.

Truth is, they don't know what they want. You hear people whispering with increasing volume that Tebow will have to change positions to stay in the league.

Right. That makes sense.

Because I'm sure a former quarterback drafted in the first round will draw far less attention as a back-up tight end. No way SportsCenter would play that story on loop 24/7.

These people are incompetent boobs of the first order.

The NFL won't make a move because of the feared media distraction and ESPN won't shut up about the media distraction even though THEY ARE THE DISTRACTION.

Coming up on SportsCenter, can Ouroboros perform in the clutch? Stephen A. Smith will scream at you about it...

ESPN has become Ouroboros, the mythical serpent that eats its own tail. It is a neverending cycle of fake arguments and hot air that tries in vain to re-create itself but succeeds only in driving the wedge further between viewers and their programming.

One can only hope the monster finally does devour itself, if not for Tim Tebow's sake, than for the sanity of all.

How Tim Tebow Melted My Icy NFL Heart

This will no doubt infuriate an already incensed Brian, but I must take a moment to commend and congratulate the great Tim Tebow on the Broncos exciting 29-23 victory over the Steelers yesterday in Denver.

No he's not a very good quarterback, in fact his ineptitude can at times be maddening but Sunday evening saw little Timmy grow up and start to become a quarterback at the NFL level. No small feat for a guy who can barely throw a spiral.

But that's what I love about him. I could do without the squeaky clean image. I've always preferred my athletes to be wildly talented, severely flawed people like Mickey Mantle or Tiger Woods.

The massive hype is also off-putting, but ESPN does that with anything and everything. they dictate the story and when the public is weary of the praise or criticism we become a fractured mass that's very upset both for and against the subject matter.

But I just can't get enough of a quarterback who comes out and gives a big ol' middle finger to the NFL establishment.

Analysts, former players, general managers, coaches, just about everyone involved with "the league" is always quick to point out that it's a different game and not everyone translates to the NFL.

I say bollocks. It's football. The defenses are a bit more complicated, the players are bigger, faster and stronger and the offensive playbooks are massive (often I think simply for the sake of being massive) but at the heart it's still just football despite what pigskin elitists would have us believe.

Once in a while a player comes along like Tebow or Michael Vick (before he learned to play QB) and they just win and do it in ways which are tough to rationalize. It makes even the most erudite of NFL coaches scratch their heads and go, "gee whiz I don't know. I guess we'll get him next time."

Guys like Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers are wonderful to watch. The sheer precision and dominance shown by their units is difficult to fully comprehend. So too however is the mediocrity and struggles of the Broncos' talented but often inept crew.

My man Eddie Royal can rush, catch, return punts and come down with jump ball touchdowns despite being the smallest guy on the field. Demaryius Thomas is a super freak with speed to burn and a stiff arm like the Heisman trophy. Eric Decker is tough as nails when he isn't getting his knee blown up like yesterday.

The Broncos' defense is dominant. That's all you really need to know.

So there is no shame in losing to such a talented team Pittsburgh, I mean that genuinely. You suited up the few healthy bodies you had on defense and sent the big gimp out at QB and he didn't quite have it. A healthy Pitt squad would not have lost.

That said, winners play on and the best teams do not always win in the NFL playoffs. I guess that's the magic of it? I haven't entirely figured it out as I still don't like the NFL.

But I do like Tim Tebow and that magic is easy to decipher.

College Football Quick Picks: Week 7

You can thank that man (Timmy Tebow) for an excellent win, and me having an above .500 record this past weekend.

I personally am a big fan of Tim Tebow, even though he's overly perfect and I constantly have to hear about it, I'm glad Urban Meyer didn't get his brain smashed in down in Baton Rouge.

My overall record is now 21-19 and creeping ever so slightly towards respectability.

There's an excellent slate of games this weekend, but two of them feature the Irish and the Hokies so I won't pick them. Though Virginia Tech will win this weekend as opposed to my preseason prediction. Gah tech is not who I thought they were...preseason predictions are stupid.


No. 8 Cincinnati @ No. 21 South Florida

The 'Nati is just too good offensively for anyone else in the Big East. Tony Pike is a great QB. USF is coming off a win over Florida State, but who hasn't beaten them lately?

Cincinnati Wins


No. 20 Oklahoma @ No. 3 Texas

As I recall, this rivalry game is still played at the Texas State Fair and the classic Cotton Bowl. My heart says I hope Oklahoma wins, but my brain is telling me as usual that Texas is too good. Should be a nice game.

Texas Wins


Minnesota @ No. 14 Penn State

I'm almost contractually obligated to pick one questionable upset per week and this time I look to Happy Valley. Penn State just isn't very good. They've got talent, but outside the Big Ten and their embarrassing non-conference slate, the Lions rarely play anyone capable of proving how mediocre they are. Minnesota and wideout Eric decker are quite capable.

Minnesota Wins


Virginia @ Maryland

I chose this game because it's so damn difficult to pick. Both these teams are in the midst of miserable seasons that may well see both Al Groh and Ralph Friedgen unemployed at seasons end. UVA has won two in a row over really bad teams though, so why not make it three?

Virginia Wins


No. 22 South Carolina @ No. 2 Alabama

This looks like a carbon copy of the Alabama-Ole Miss game last week. On paper it should be close, but reality for these two teams is quite different. If the game were at home for the Gamecocks I'd give them more of a shot, but 'Bama is on a roll and shouldn't falter at home.

Alabama Wins

So there are five picks. Remember to watch No. 25 Notre Dame and No. 6 USC at 3:30 on the Notre Dame Broadcasting Channel (NBC), then switch over to ESPN2 at 6pm to catch No. 4 Virginia Tech and No. 19 Georgia Tech.

College Football Quick Picks: Week 6

Normally I would put off my picks until Thursday, but tomorrow I'll hit the road for the 500 mile ride down to Blacksburg for the Tech-Boston College game this weekend. As per the norm, I've packed nothing and done very little actual planning. All I know is I have a ticket to the game and a couch directly behind the stadium (in someone's apartment, I should stress that) so I'm good to go.

I'm excited needless to say. Boston College has proven to be much better than people would have thought and they always play the Hokies tough. I feel much better now that Matt Ryan is in Atlanta and not Lane Stadium.

Anyway, these picks will be very quick indeed because there are probably better uses of my time.


No. 21 Nebraska @ No. 24 Missouri

Mizzou is undefeated and looking very strong. Blaine Gabbert is an excellent quarterback. That said, I love Nebraska's defense led by Ndamukong Suh who is the best defensive lineman in America. Also Husker RB Roy Helu, Jr. sat out practice the other day after not feeling well, he should play Thursday night.

Nebraska Wins


No. 3 Alabama @ No. 20 Ole Miss

On paper this one looks close. It shouldn't be. Ole Miss was overrated and 'Bama is better than I had expected in preseason and I thought highly of them.

Alabama Wins


Wisconsin @ No. 9 Ohio State

This is my upset special. I'm still not sold on the Buckeyes and I've liked what I've seen from the Badgers. Probably not a smart pick, but a pick none the less.

Wisconsin Wins


No. 1 Florida @ No. 4 LSU

I'm told this is a big game. I like LSU from a fan perspective, but my analyst brain tells me they're overrated at the four spot. Should be a good game, but with or without Tim Tebow, Florida should be able to pull this one out.

Florida Wins


No. 22 Georgia Tech @ Florida State

Talk about a bad season. You know things are low in Tallahassee when there's talk of forcing out Bobby Bowden. He'll be around all season, and probably next year will be his swan song. GT struggles with speed and FSU will win one for ol' Bobby.

Florida State Wins


That's all I've got. Not a terrific slate of games this weekend so I only found 5 worthy of picking. Enjoy.