White House Photography, or Why I Need Pete Souza to Follow Me Around

Editor's Note: This post is in no way an endorsement or condemnation of specific policies or of the President himself, it's simply a commentary on excellent photography. Outside of politics I do happen to think of the POTUS as a cool guy, so we're pretty much the same person.

By Justin Cates

Pete Souza is the current Chief Official White House photographer for President Obama and was also the official photographer during Ronald Reagan's second term in office.

That means he's had incredible access to people and places few could ever dream of. This presents a truly remarkable opportunity for an artist with a perpetually refreshing canvas.

One doesn't need extraordinary skill to make photos interesting, but great photographers like Souza have the innate ability to make everyday actions carry an unexpected weight.

"No I'm still getting a PC Load Letter error..."

I don't need someone to take candid pictures of me sitting around in sweatpants, but a shot of me silhouetted against a setting sun as I gaze thoughtfully into the distance would make a lovely Mother's Day gift.

Plus I do lot's of amazing things that go sadly unnoticed. When leaning on something, I too kick a foot on it's toe. I'm not even trying to be a badass, it just happens!

"Look, if you want seconds governor just ask."

Granted, I don't hold as many press conferences as I probably should, but I think my personal pho-tog would still have plenty to cover. 

I often stand idly while waiting for someone to tell me where to go, I sometimes walk with purpose and rarely do I attend an event where I don't think, "Man, I bet I look absolutely terrific in the foreground."

"Man, I bet I look absolutely terrific in the foreground...you too honey"

What about kids you say? I don't usually hang out with them, but when I do it's undeniably adorable. They love me even when I have a scary beard. Lot's of opportunity for some heart-warming moments...which come to think of it takes care of Christmas for all the grandparents.

"Hurry kid! Michelle's going to make us eat vegetables!"

Ultimately, my friends and I simply don't take enough pictures and most of the ones we have are either unfit for publication or staged. I'm all about in the moment naturalism when it comes to this stuff and you're lucky (or probably a girl) if you can convince me to pose for a picture. 

It makes remembering life easier when you have a visual reference, plus how else will you bore your relatives and Facebook friends?

So I guess this is an open casting call to anyone with some free time who would be interested in documenting my existence. 

Silence? FINE. I'll just do it myself then, as soon as I can figure out the timer on this stupid camera...  

Yep, it's a walk-off. Where's David Bowie when you need him?

Check out some more of Pete Souza's work at his official website where you can find everything from portraits of world leaders to the Chicago Cubs (see what I did there?).

Westboro Baptist Church Can Suck an Egg, and Other Thoughts

Editor's Note: The following are my thoughts and reflections on the recent spate of despicable violence in America. I didn't talk about the specifics of those acts because I learned long ago that they can't be explained. My attempts to create one coherent narrative may well have failed, but hopefully someone gets something from it. It's mostly me working out my own stuff on "paper".

Sometimes it takes a major event to shake loose the truest emotional reactions of the human psyche.

Our day-to-day lives rarely allow us —or perhaps we don’t allow ourselves— to reflect on our emotions unless something jarring occurs.

In those instances, we’re forced to confront the fears and anxieties that lie at the very core of even the most hardened amongst us.

The terrible killings of two firefighters near Rochester, NY coming on the heels of the unthinkable murders at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT have brought back to the surface all the pain experienced by Hokies like myself in April of 2007 and beyond.

We all deal with pain and grief in our own ways, and the families that directly lose someone in these tragedies should be allowed to do so on their own terms as well.

However, that wouldn’t be the case if the Westboro Baptist Church had their way.

They’ve protested funerals in the past, and hollowly threatened to protest many more including those of the Newtown victims.

In August of 2012, President Obama signed into law the Honoring America’s Veterans and Caring for Camp Lejeune Families Act of 2012.

Among other things, the legislation forced protests such as these to move at least 300 feet from the funeral site of a member of the country’s armed service members.

It seems necessary to take further steps as the protests now extend to innocent civilians and even children.

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It's been snowing like mad here today, and I've been ruminating on several thoughts this afternoon and evening. I rarely feel more of the gonzo flair than when snow is coming down and I'm stuck inside furiously hammering out rhythms of text.

At one point, I was reminded of a conversation that friend of the blog and theoretical contributor Andy and I had the other day.

We were sitting together Monday morning as I read some of the reports from Webster — a suburb of Rochester where he lives and works.

Andy later informed me that the Westboro crazies planned to take their act on the road once again for the funerals of the public servants who died trying to do their jobs.

He wanted to go out and meet their protests with one of his own. I was cordially invited.

After struggling to string together my thoughts on these matters today, I finally reasoned that sneaking one of my Dad’s cigars would be the best way to ease my brain to attempt to put things together.

Earlier in the weekend, we had spoken of getting a cigar and engaging in a casual airing of grievances, but the tobacco shop had been closed.

I bundled up and shoveled a single path down the driveway, curving around the corner just beyond where the porch light reached.

I stood smoking in the shadows listening to the still night air as the snow continued falling around me.

I reflected on the aforementioned violent events and my relation to them, and I thought about what Andy had suggested regarding protesting the crazies.

I considered what I would say in such a confrontation, and while I fear it would be viewed purely as a threat, I think it’s the only fair question that could be posed to such unreasonable people.

“What if someone killed you Mr. Phelps? What if some gun-toting fiend showed up at one of your protests and popped off a few rounds hmmmmm? Would that be God’s will?”

Invariably, he would deflect the question and dive into some hateful rant on gays in the military or recklessly declare murdered children being part of God’s plan. You can never make headway with these people and I’ve often thought that they are best left ignored.

It was then that I realized, they can’t be ignored.

I respect the right our Constitution grants us to speak freely without fear for persecution from the government.

However, I think it’s clear that some speech can be considered so incendiary and hateful that it does the public no good to hear it.

If you’re of similar mind, I encourage you to sign this Whitehouse.gov petition asking President Obama to declare the Westboro Baptist Church a hate group.

They’ve already been banned from entering the United Kingdom, and I think some of their language is close enough to be considered advocacy of violence toward various religions, ethnic groups and homosexuals — an important part of the FBI’s formal definition of a hate group.

At the very least, the President can take action to make their tasteless funeral protests more difficult.

Here’s hoping he goes a step further.    

Football and Politics as Usual in America

It’s football season sure, but not far beyond the bone-rattling hits of our nation’s most favored and dangerous sport lies a far more grotesque battle for dominance.

It’s election season and as Barack Obama and Mitt Romney continuously engage in the time-honored American tradition of lying and manipulating half-truths, it’s important to take a step back and marvel at the ghastly machinery of our political system at work.

Someone has to do it and the national media certainly aren’t the ones for the job.

The major news networks gamely tip toe around the parapets of actual journalism, but few are asking hard questions or taking anyone to task over the senseless nature of what has become an endless cycle of campaigning.

There are two things this has done to the way we are governed in this country.

First, politicians are less likely to attempt to make difficult, sweeping changes for fear of backlash come the next election. I’ve heard pundits discussing the idea that if re-elected the President can finally attempt to try and accomplish some big controversial things. 

However, the hyper-partisan politicians of our day have created the “lame duck” President, someone who can’t be trusted because he won’t be held accountable for his actions since he doesn’t have to run for re-election. 

President Obama wondering why he's doing this again.

Senate minority leader Mitch McConnell famously said with no touch of irony that “Our top political priority over the next two years should be to deny President Obama a second term.”

Which brings me to my second point. The election cycle has become so accelerated that a four-year term in office has really been shrunk down to two years before you have to begin running for re-election.

Coupled with the countless representatives jockeying for position as challengers for the White House who should instead be busy governing, we see a “lame duck” government as a whole and not just a President.

Just as professional football players live out their lives as hired assassins playing with an eye towards their next contract, our politicians are primarily motivated by how they best position themselves for the next election.

Governor Romney realizing what he's gotten himself into.

In addition to the unnecessarily accelerated campaign cycle, there are the record-setting gobs of money being thrust at politicians busy stumping about our nations financial struggles.

In August alone President Obama and the Democrats raised $114 million while governor Romney and the Republicans raked in $111 million.

According to this nifty chart from the New York Times, that puts the total money raised at just over $1.1 billion, more than $900 million of which has been spent already.

Now that’s a drop in the bucket compared to the amount of money the United States owes, but it could certainly be used for much better purposes than political attack ads.

Could you imagine for example politicians traveling the country and holding rallies to fund our educational system or putting on a $25,000 a plate dinner to help families displaced by natural disasters?

That’s pandering we could all get behind.

Ultimately, that’s what it’s all about. Politicians as a whole are little more than generally incompetent grifters with an insatiable lust for power and a taste for the flesh of young dogs.

Politicians will say just about anything they think we want to hear to get in our good graces, and we capitulate because there’s some special connection we’ve created in our minds.

These are dangerous people and they will stop at nothing to get to you. They’ll keep calling and sending letters and bombarding you with unwanted advertisements during commercial breaks of your beloved football games.

So while you’re watching oversized humans bash their heads into one another, keep in mind the delightful irony that it’s the exact same thing our politicians are doing with much higher stakes.

Be wary of the real beasts this football season.

Auto-Tune the News

Somehow I had never heard of Auto-Tune the News, but it appears to be required viewing.

This particular song came to my attention because it features Weezer but the real stars are congressman Charles Rangel (D-NY) and the big guy President Obama. I legitimately think Barack has Lil' Wayne writing his speeches from jail.

I should point out that the President has a really brilliant bit towards the end where he implies democrats are moving forward while republicans are going in reverse utilizing a car metaphor.

Hats off Mr. Wayne.

State of the Union

I’ve decided to try a “new” journalistic tact to provide some more unique content to our little slice of the blogosphere.

My creative juices tend to flow best just as I reach the state of tiredness that makes my basic functions difficult and renders most everything hilarious. Said juices tend to flow freely just after midnight and return to a sporadic trickle just before dawn.

My circadian rhythm appears fatally flawed.

None the less, I shall bring you these ramblings- which may or may not be the continued makings of my first book- as they appear the day after.

It wouldn’t be true “gonzo” journalism if I edited them, so I’ll try to avoid the temptation to tinker, but I fear my maniacal alter-ego “the editor” may continue to inflict his knowledge upon us all.

Here are the initial impressions from POTUS' big talk, virtually unedited:


Get off the Goddamn Internets (sic) man! It’s rotting your brain from the outside in. A beautifully useful tool, yes, but there are so many fools shouting at the same time the cacophony sometimes drowns out what really matters.

As if I didn’t have enough reason to despise the dumbing down of America known as Twitter, seeing elected officials on their Blackberry’s “tweeting” during the State of the Union address puts me on edge.

I’m a 24-year-old man who has grown up squarely in the age of technology, and even I know there are times when it’s not appropriate to be on your damn phone.

I don’t even answer my phone during dinner, yet these people feel it’s totally appropriate to send messages during a speech by the President?

It’s not just any speech either, it’s the most important speech of the year hands down. For a public speaking nerd like me, it’s not unlike a huge sporting event.

Obama’s first State of the Union was a pretty good one too. It was like the previous guy’s eligibility was finally up and this year for the big game we finally had a quarterback who could throw (and didn’t fumble as much).

Obama shines under the bright lights of the big stage, and while his prose was a bit lengthy, I thought overall it was well thought out and presented.

I’m not commenting so much on the policies, those seemed to be a mixed bag. Even the general tenor of the speech was a bit too arrogant for my tastes. All this, “America! We’re #1!” nonsense is just that. However, it’s just so utterly delightful to listen to a speaker who can actually speak.

The cynical bastard will reply, “Oh well he has a teleprompter.”

To that, I must remind you he’s reading a speech that’s over an hour long on national television in front of ostensibly the entire nation. I’m not sure John and Jane Q. Public could hack that.

Obama-ball: Steroids In MLB A Serious Issue

Newly elected President Barack Obama has not had much time in office to enact new bills and pass new legislature. He has, however, taken the time to weigh in on the revelation that yet another high-profile MLB player used steroids in a selfish attempt to enhance his own performance.

Here's what Barack had to say about Roid-Rod:

Justin and I have actually not had the chance to debate this topic amongst ourselves but I am almost certain we are both in agreement of President Obama's remarks. 

The dark era known by the presence and abuse of steroids in Major League Baseball became darker when it was revealed that Alex Rodriguez used steroids earlier in his career with the Texas Rangers. 

America's youth cannot continue to receive these embarrassing messages that the "American Past-time" is as tarnished as it was during the 1919 Chicago Black Sox World Series scandal. 

Whether or not Congress should be dealing with this issue is an entirely different story. However, the fact remains that one of the most prominent role models for the youth of America hit a bad 'dinger out of the park.

Yes, he has apologized. No, it still does not change the fact that what he did was selfish, immoral, and downright stupid.

While it may seem like Roid-Rod is being unfairly attacked (no chance he sues for libel, by the way, since he's already publicly admitted his faults) let it be known that my displeasure toward steroid abuse in athletics is equally distributed amongst all defenders, regardless of sport, fame, or notoriety.

As once proclaimed by Chris Cornell, formerly of Soundgarden and now pursuing his own solo musical career, Major League Baseball "Fell On Black Days."

Politics As Usual

With the Presidential election just 50 days from now, campaign advertising is becoming more prominent on the television radar. John McCain's campaign has come under heavy fire (and rightfully so) for their negative ads attacking Barack Obama. As it turns out, many of Obama's quotes are distorted in the ads, and in some cases blatant lies are told.

I've been leaning toward voting for Obama anyway, but the recent vice presidential selections (more on that later) coupled with McCain's increasingly out of touch and negative campaigning have made the decision seem very clear to me at this point in time.

Take a look below at what I'm talking about.